


but how long?

by roma (thef1princess)



Category: GP2 Series RPF
Genre: Depression, Drabble, I'm Sorry, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Self-Hatred, Tonio needs hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-08
Updated: 2016-10-08
Packaged: 2018-08-20 06:32:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8239426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thef1princess/pseuds/roma
Summary: When he came to them, they stop laught and they started to talk with him but he could see that they look little annoyed. Why did they have that look?





	

**Author's Note:**

> I want to say that this is just a fanfiction and I hope that this is not happening. But if any of this things is/are happening to you then go and talk with someone about it. Friends, family, teachers or message me. I'm always here to listen to you and cheer you up.
> 
> I apologize for mistakes. For this one I decided to not ask for beta. Hope it is not that bad. :)

_‚Do you see them? Do you see them laughing without you?‘_

_‚They are laughing at you and your ugly face.‘_

Antonio’s head was full of this voices. Voices that existed in his head and were talking to him like that. It was his demons whispering truths he already knew.

He was standing in the dark part of garage and watching his friends talking to each other and laughing. There was still this rational voice who was telling him that he should ignore this voices but he can’t. They were right, wasn’t they? When he came to them, they stop laught and they started to talk with him but he could see that they look little annoyed. Why did they have that look?

_‚Because you interrupt them and their conversation. They don’t want you here, don’t you see that?‘_

 

**_///_ **

 

_‚Stop talking. No one cares about you and your stupid words._

They were with younger lads from F1 and just having fun. Antonio was sitting between Sean and Alex with Stoffel, Pascal, Carlos closing the circle around the table. They were talking about actual situation in F1 (sponsorship, money, age..) Everyone told their opinion on this topic. When he started to talk he felt like no one is listening to him and it made him feel little upset. Why did they not listen him?

_‚Don’t you see that? No one cares about you and your boring opinions. Just shut up and listen to them.‘_

 

**_///_ **

 

_‚Don’t you dare to eat it. Don’t or you will be fat!‘_

Sean, Pierre and Alex went on duo date and for Antonio’s shame, Alex and Sean selected McDonalds as place for it. They ordered hamburgers, fries and cokes because they thought that they deserve this junky foods after all the diets they had to. Antonio loved this kind of food but he cannot eat that so he ordered salad with orange juice. His choice surprised other boys because they knew that he loves this food. Sean offered him some of his fries but he refused it. If he would eat it then he would be fat, right?

_‚Of course you will.‘_

 

**_///_ **

 

_‚You are worthless.‘_

_‚Sean doesn’t love you‘_

_‚Stop talking about yourself, no one cares about you!‘_

Antonio was tired of this voices and words. This words hurt him and he tried to not trust them but it was hard. He tried but darkness and self-hate took him and he started believe all this. All that he could do was crying when he was alone and fake-smiling when he was around someone. It was all that he could do and how could he survive. But how long?


End file.
